Hey hey! Welcome to this great path to our physical, mental and spiritual health. For this enormous quest to begin I had to stumble over and over and over again (and know that we never stop stumbling, because there will always be something NEW to learn). And I swear it has not been easy at all, but we must always seek our balance and inner peace (giving up is not an option).
Nobody have life figured out, we can have certain comforts but we are never in total order and I just want to tell you how it went for me and why we are here today.
About 10 years ago I began to feel physically ill and did not know why, I began to have spasms of shortness of breath and attacks of suffocation (as if it were asthma) and then came the search for doctors and specialists in different subjects and areas to know what it was happening to me, from otorhinolaryngologists to temazcales to AAA retreats (you read that right, although I never had addiction or alcohol problems) and this just to name a few.
We could really spend an eternity counting everything that I tried and tried in search of my physical health (here I was not yet focused on my mental health).
It was then that neither the AAA, nor general practitioners, nor specialists, nor the pellets, nor the temazcal, nor the cleansed with egg, really, nothing, absolutely NOTHING was helping me and it was only getting worse; It was then that the fears began, the sweat and tingling in the hands, uncontrollable anxiety to the degree of not being able to eat because of the fear of choking.
Eventually I began to think about my mental health and I wondered if these discomforts could be due to something else and it is there that I contact a psychologist to start therapy and I realize that everything that my body has reflected up to this point is completely connected with what I feel, with my EMOTIONS (such as fear, anguish, happiness, etc.) and I am realizing that there are many factors to consider, from complicated ex-partners, family conflicts and those foreign responsibilities that we decide assume as ours.
But there I do not stop, I only lasted a year in therapy and I left it for financial reasons; Even so, I felt I had the tools to face what I was experiencing, but oh my delusional! Obviously not, growth and learning never stops and on the contrary, as long as I continued with negative projections, nothing was going to go right.
So, I continued with medicines daily and looking for the doctor to give me the magic pill to be at peace, that's when I came to the National Institute of Respiratory Diseases in Mexico City where I was diagnosed with ASTHMA, which made me buy into the condition; I felt more vulnerable and said to myself: "Now I'm going to die" and of course I added MORE medicine to my life.
Of course, by this point I am completely worn out, unmotivated, sad and disappointed in everyone and everything. But without a doubt today I stop here to tell you that "The job was always, is and will be mine",, my well-being, my peace and my happiness are totally my responsibility.
Photo by DAVIDCOHEN on Unsplash